Alison vs. Her Client

ALISON vs. HER CLIENT

STEPHEN DAVIES

I won't wear any make-up today. Well, maybe just a touch of eyeliner in the corners and a dab of mascara on the upper lashes. If he fancies me a little less then I might stand a fighting chance of watching his brain tick over. And anyway, it's my turn to fancy him.

Not really the sort of thoughts one might expect a solicitor to wake up with, these were nonetheless Alison MacDonald's first cogitations of the day. The man in question is one of her clients; she has been acting in Johnny's defence for nine months now on a no-win no-fee basis and is convinced one hundred per cent that he has been lying to her. He is doing this to buy time (the plaintiffs' time, that is) until the matter reaches the steps of the County Court, at which point he will change both his solicitors and his story, thereby getting out of paying Alison and her partners. Johnny will have to pay up in the end, but this will probably take the form of an out-of-court settlement for much less than he actually owes; Johnny's second solicitors will advise the plaintiffs' solicitors of their client's heart-rending personal and financial difficulties at the very last moment. The plaintiffs' solicitors will then advise their clients to accept a derisory cash offer rather than attempt to recover the full debt on the grounds that even the most maverick of judges would be powerless to take this clever little bastard for more than a fiver a week, for the rest of his days. Should the case ever reach the County Court, that is.

Presently under the shower, Alison reflects that she doesn't really mind not being paid. Johnny's attentions alone make waking up worthwhile, and for this reason the longer he draws things out, the happier she becomes. Then again if she were to make her feelings known to Johnny before the verdict or settlement, then he could feasibly sue her for wasting his time, professional negligence and misconduct. Yes, thinking about it that's just the sort of thing cunning old Johnny would do.

And so, for the present at least, Alison's only sensible option is to keep up the incessant, ever-vaguer dialogue between solicitors in order to buy some time for herself, for Johnny and for herself and Johnny.